In the shittest of times, the question that comes to mind is “What have I done to deserve this?!”
Surely this terrible string of events is destined for someone else, a right arsehole who really has it coming for them, rather than you? You’re a good person! Fair enough, you have your flaws, but nothing drastic enough to deserve such trauma!
Why do bad things happen to good people?! It’s really the injustice of it all that stings.
The thing is though, that injustice is totally made up. It’s a complete work of fiction you’ve created in your own mind which only serves to make you feel outraged and therefore, worse.
The alternative to it being unjustified, is it being justified.
Remember that time you did that thing you regret, that thing that you still cringe about at 3.30am? Maybe that is what caused this – they do say karma comes back to bite you on the arse.
Is that helping you feel better? No, I didn’t think so.
I mean this in the nicest possible way – but you are not important enough to anger the universe this much.
In reality, there is no “bad” things happening to “good” people – it’s just things happening to people.
Disconnecting from the feelings of injustice, of blame and of fault is the only way to stay sane. The situation just is and you can choose how to react to it.
Knowing this doesn’t stop the sadness, but it does take away some of the stress.