I’ve been thinking about writing about synchronicity today, how when things just line up and the perfect circumstances seem to appear quite by accident. One chance encounter or event sparking a chain of unlikely, but fortuitous, reactions and perhaps I will still write about that for another time – but a few things today have coincided and pointed me in a different direction.
The first one was from my big treat of the week – the new episode of Grey’s Anatomy. They do a little voiceover at the start that sets up the episode and the one I watched today was how we are taught that suffering is impolite. Many of us don’t get medical support until whatever pain is unbearable. We don’t talk about how we feel about massive medical diagnosis’s in “polite” conversation. When we are asked how we are, we say we’re fine.
The other sign that I should write about this was an actual sign. Well, a photo of an actual sign on Pinterest to be more accurate. “You can’t heal if you keep pretending you’re not hurt.” Of course this is relevant physically as well and mentally, although I feel we acknowledge physical pain more readily than emotional. Keep walking on a sprained ankle and it’s not going to get better. Keep squashing down and hiding from those uncomfy feelings and they’re not going to get better either.
Saying your fine is not the same as being fine. And who wants to just be fine anyway? (Unless you’re still using the early 00’s parlance of fiiiiine to mean hot of course, in which case, count me in.)
You could be fine limping about on a slightly sprained ankle for the rest of your life, you’d still get where you were going but I doubt it would be much fun. If the pain was bad enough you’d take a few days to rest it, foot up, ice pack on. (Much like I did when I slipped on some banana on the floor like something out of a cartoon last year. Too comedic not to share, but I missed the Spice Girls reunion tour gig I had tickets for.)
Emotional pain we just keep ignoring though. We’ve got so many ways of forgetting about it for a while (as I alluded too in this post last week) but imagine what we could do if we just accepted how we felt, didn’t judge ourselves for it and started to take responsibility for healing it.
Why is that a scary thought? Probably for a few reasons – as above, we’ve been told it’s impolite to talk about this stuff. We Brits should keep a stiff upper lip and all that crap. Bollocks to that. Get it out in the open, or at least admit to yourself that’s how you feel and you can start dealing with it.
Second possible reason, perhaps we feel that we deserve to feel bad, or carry this burden for some reason or another. If you’re thinking that you actually do deserve your particular burden I want to ask you a serious question –Do you think that your child or best friend or even a stranger deserves to carry these same feelings you are? No, I didn’t think so. You do not deserve to be carrying this either. Give yourself permission to start healing.
*Edit* After I wrote this I went to watch a video from 2 hypnotists who were talking about this exact thing, and then saw another pin on Pinterest that backed it up again!