I’ve been staring at a blank word document for a bit too long now trying to make a start on a blog for this week. If I had to sum up how I feel this week in one pithy phrase it would be “tired and uninspired.”
I don’t like to write about Covid, I’d rather you could have these few minutes to pretend it’s not happening; but the fact is, it is happening. Whilst I’m grateful that myself and family are all currently safe and well, I’m utterly fed up of being confined to quarters so to speak, of events that have already been rescheduled and moved having to be rescheduled and moved again or cancelled. It’s no ones fault, but it’s disappointing when something you looked forward to gets changed, even when there’s no other option.
It’s frustrating me that the goal posts keep moving. Lock down for a few weeks, until mid-February, no later than 8th March, it could be Easter, perhaps the summer, things might be back on track this time next year. It seems endless and it sucks.
I’m annoyed, grouchy and I feel sad at times and I may just go back to bed for a little weep shortly. And I feel like, on occasion, this is a perfectly reasonable reaction to the situation. It’s healthy to acknowledge whatever I feel and just allow those feelings to be.
No one has to be happy and positive every minute of every day.
It’s OK to not be OK.
So, as I often do in times of adversity, I looked to the ancient Roman & Greek Stoic philosophers. On this occasion I copied and pasted the quote (below) at the top of my (then blank) page and took inspiration from there.
Our actions may be impeded…but there can be no impeding our intentions or dispositions. Because we can accommodate and adapt. The mind adapts and converts to its own purposes the obstacle to our acting. The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.
So, I use my lack of inspiration as my inspiration.
Instead of staring at a blank screen, starting a sentence and deleting it, I just throw down everything I’m feeling and share it with you. Not in an attempt to garner any kind of sympathy but to show you that it’s OK if you’re feeling it too.
Feeling overwhelmed and like you want to cry doesn’t mean that you have a mental health issue, it means you are going through a load of crap and it can be hard to deal with. It means you are normal.
One of the best thing we can do right now to support ourselves and each other is to nurture all the relationships we have around us. Chat to your neighbours over the fence. Call your family. Have a group zoom call with your mates. Stay connected.