We’re getting towards the end of January now and I honestly don’t know if it seems like it’s flown by or whether Christmas and New year seem like a lifetime ago, I think it might be both if that is possible?
Statistically speaking, if you made any new year’s resolutions you’ve probably given up on them by now. (I know, I’m a little ray of sunshine, aren’t you glad I came?!) I find that there are only a few reasons people give up on things …
- They don’t really want them.
Sometimes we try to achieve things because we think we should, or we think other people think we should. This is not the recipe for success. You really need to know and believe in WHY you want to do something.
If you’re honest with yourself and this is what has happened to the goal you set yourself, just leave it on the ground where it fell and release yourself from the obligation of trying to meet other people’s expectations.
- Failure is not an option.
Sometimes we set the stakes too high in our mind. When failure is not an option it can be very scary and easier not to start. Perfectionism and procrastination are two sides of the same coin.
This usually comes from a belief that we will not be accepted by someone if we make a mistake or fail – have a think back to when this might have been taught to you as a child, perhaps being told off by a parent or teacher for getting something wrong. (Or being separated from all your friends and kept inside at break time for failing a times tables test…I’m looking at you Miss W.)
- We’re only willing to give 100%.
It’s all or nothing. Only 100% will do. It’s brilliant to have high standards, and lets face it we do need to have something to aim for, but we can’t always deliver on those high standards we set for ourselves. Maybe you don’t have time or energy to do what you set out to do, or something comes along and disrupts your plans, so you end up doing nothing.
What is not so easy to do, is to look at what we CAN do, instead of what we can’t do.
Can’t walk 5 miles today? Maybe you can walk to the end of the road instead.
Can’t scrub the whole house? Maybe you can tidy out one drawer, or just clean the loo.
Can’t read for an hour? Maybe you can read 1 page.
The little actions don’t seem like much but repeated over time they make a much bigger difference to your progress than only acting when you can achieve the high standards you’d ideally like.
If you give 1% 100 times, you’ll still get there, it just might take a little longer.